So, yeah, another week of little writing. The biggest writing thing I did was on Sunday, 3 / 30 / 2025, my buddy Zach and I proofread through 6 chapters of a horror story I wrote many, many years back. It took us 5 hours, we went through less than 16000 words and about 56 pages. It was a big finish to a weekly project we were chipping away at.

As for the horror story itself, it's a hot mess with a few gems here and there. But I think I might rewrite it in the future, we shall see. I wrote the story in November 2012 and it is amazing how much I have grown as an author over the years. Though, some quarks (like using ‘to’ instead of ‘at’ are still present even after thirteen years of engaging with writing.

So, it is getting late as I write this and I have no topics or rants really lined up to pad this out 😜

Instead, I will post a couple short of flash fiction from the “Artie the Arsewhole” series.

Adventures of Artie the Arsewhole #2

A fire rages at the sugar factory and it is out of control.

“We cannot get the fire out! There is just too much sugar feeding it!”

The firefighters are unable to stop the blaze. This looks like a job for—

“YEAH! Put that fire out! YEAH!”

“Look out! It is Artie the Arsewhole! Run!”

The firefighters then flee the scene.

“YEAH! Butt-stomp that fire! YEAH!”

And like a falling meteor, with his butt aimed at the center of the flaming sugar factory, our hero crashed down.

“YEAH! Super-Butt-Stomp! YEAH!”

And as the impact puts out the fire, and annihilates the factory, molten sugar rains down on the city. At least the fire is out.

“YEAH! Stop’d that fire! YEAH! Be that ARSEWHOLE!”

You be that Arsewhole, Artie. You be that Arsewhole!

Adventures of Artie the Arsewhole #3

A tornado stampedes towards an innocent lavender farm.

“Not my lavender! Someone, help!”

The lavender farmer cries out. This looks like a job for—

“YEAH! Save that lavender! YEAH!”

“No! It is Artie the Arsewhole! My lavender is doomed!”

“YEAH! Blow that tornado away! YEAH!”

Our hero then takes a great big breath. And—

“YEAH! Super-Blow-Away-Breath! YEAH!”

“The tornado is going away! My lavender is saved!”

But as the tornado turns away from the lavender farm, it consumes a meat factory. A shower of meat then rains down all over the tri-county area, the likes of which have not been seen since Kentuky 1876.

At least the lavender was saved.

“YEAH! Save’d that lavender! YEAH! Be that ARSEWHOLE!”

And they will need it to mask the smell, Artie.

You be that Arsewhole!

Adventures of Artie the Arsewhole #4

A band of super-thieves are robbing the national gold reserve.

“All the gold are belong to us!”

Can these evil-doers be stopped? This looks like a job for—

“YEAH! Stop those bad guys! YEAH!”

“Oh-no! It is the—hero? Artie the Arsewhole!”

“You can have all the gold!”

“We surrender!”

“YEAH! Got the thing to stop bad guys! YEAH!”

Our hero’s eyes then glow a heroic red.

“YEAH! Super-Melting-Eye-Beams! YEAH!”

“Oh no! He is melting the gold around us! This is the end!”

The band of super-thieves are then washed away in a wave of melting gold. It is a disastrous mess that will cost millions of dollars to undo.

At least the super-thieves were stopped.

“YEAH! Stop’d those bad guys! YEAH! Be that ARSEWHOLE!”

And a golden Arsewhole you be, Artie. Be that golden Arsewhole!

So, I hope you had fun reading more Adventures of Artie the Arsewhole. Until next time, maybe I’ll write a little more of Artie’s adventures. Or maybe I’ll rant about current geek news. Who knows, that’s why I like writing these updates. Its more exciting when even I have no clue what the next blog will be about.

Good Luck and YEAH!!!

—Buck

PS: I played a Bard in a recent D&D game. I called him Sabby-Dabby-Dooby and he was an old prospector dwarf who was all about mining. When we finally got into the mines, at the last hour of the game, we faced off against Bat-People and my dwarf accidentally broke upon a seal that awoke the giant Bat-Queen. But it's okay, Teddy Roosevelt possessed one of the party members and he blew up the island before the Bat-People could conquer the world. That was a wacky and wild and super fun game.

Maybe in hindsight I should have added all of this in the actual update but I like making these PS afterthoughts more random and silly.